Building Christian Relationships
Coming to terms with our single status can help us
build stronger healthier Christian Relationships in the body of Christ. The tendency is to drive down the highway of loneliness after a prolonged period of being on
our own, which can be a big challenge for many Christian singles, especially when our
relationship with God is not as strong and God centered as it could be. We can sometimes feel disconnected with our
local church by not fitting in as we would hope, especially if there is not a
singles support group or singles ministries to become a part of.
Relationship with God Single or married our primary relationship is with God. In the garden of Eden God walked in fellowship with Adam. |
When it was just the two of them they walked and talked together as friends. The first four commandments talk about the relationship we are to have with God so before we can be successful in any Christian relationship we have to walk in close relationship with God.
Relationship with our Parents
God
calls us to honor our parents, as a command that means we are to love them, obey
them, and take care of them in their older years. Even now in my forties I have to listen and
not back chat my 83 year old dad when he is giving me a ticking off. I respect what he has to say even if I don’t
agree with it. Exodus 20:12 “Honor your father
and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you". I also believe it's a good indication as to how your potential partner love and respects their parents is how they will love and respect you.
Relationship with our Church
The church is the body of Christ and as single adults not having a spouse to lead or submit to, we are to then submit to our pastors in our local churches. Christian relationships in church at best can be shallow if your church is not one of promoting fellowship. How often do you get together outside of Sunday service? Do you attend bible study? Is there opportunity to hang out, eat together and get to know each other on a deeper level? Acts 2:44-47, Psalm 55:14, Romans 12:10. This can be a great source for building Christian relationships by encouraging each other in the faith, disciplining someone and being discipled and being accountable to the leadership in your church.
Relationship with Friends
Who are your friends? Who do you tend to hang out with? Who is the person you phone first when you need a listening ear? My mum used to say ‘show me your friends and I’ll tell you who you are,’ a great mum proverb. II Cor. 6:14-18 says we should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers so if you have problems that need Godly wisdom and prayer how would you get that if your main circle of friends are unbelievers who have a totaly worldly persective. My main Christian relationships are with my church family whom I fellowship with regularly, I have close unbelieving friends but they know I have certain beliefs so I won’t be joining them in the club or hanging out in the pub smoking and drinking and they respect that.
Relationship with our Spouse
This is the one that as singles we don’t have, but marriage partners or courting partners, after Christ should be the closest most intimate relationship we could have. This is the one I want to dwell deeper into by looking at how to develop a close relationship with a potential spouse whilst keeping it holy and keeping that relationship tight once we are married. If you go in with your eyes in the clouds believing everything will be perfect you could end up coming out into a mighty big storm.